Conversation with my Korean mother

My mother is here, taking care of me, doing a great job.

She has been insisting that I eat soup, (though it hasn't been happening). 

 Soup will give me a bigger milk supply!  SOUP!

"But Mom, can't I just drink a lot of water and eat food?
Isn't that the same thing?!??!"

"No.  With soup there are special ingredients... 

(riiiiiiiight)

...Isn't it amazing that God created milk alone for the baby to grow?"

"I know.  There's this one girl I know that had a
6 month old baby that weighed 30 lbs!  All breast milk!"

"She must have eaten a lot of soup..."

(Aiiiyaiiiyaiii)

armpits

This morning I woke up to the SUN coming through my window!  It was great.  Then my eye caught a glimpse of my hairy armpit, and I could care less that they were hairy.  Have I turned granola?
I used to swim and play waterpolo for my high school, and made SURE my armpits were hairless!  Do you know how much work that is?  We swam everyday, thus they were exposed everyday!

I may have the Asian trait of having only slightly hairy legs and arms, wispy and thin.  But my armpits must have come from my hairy White dad! Porcupine thick- and black!

So I shaved and shaved.  The worst was when there was an ingrown hair.  I don't know what's worse: a hairy armpit, or an acne armpit. And it's painful!  So one day, I experiemented with TWEEZERS.  And with my right-handed skills I plucked every hair out of my left armpit.  It was painful, but BARE!  And I didn't have to repluck for at least a week!

As I attempted the other side, I realized that my left-handed skills were not so good!  OH NO!  So I asked my little brother Michael to pluck my other side.  And he did.  And we may have repeated this procedure a couple more times until my plucking fad fizzled. And it was our little secret.  Until now.  THE END.

Snowflakes!

 

  

 

Pickers and Plums

Friends and family have labeled me as "the picker".  

I may not take a whole peice of cake, because my stomach says "I'm not hungry".

But that doesn't mean my taste buds don't want that fatty, gooey, wonderfulness!  

So I pick a little here, and I pick a little there until I easily eat 

half the cake.  

Do I need to quit this habit??  Maybe...

Well, folks, I'm not alone.  Lookie lookie at what Elena did this morning!

swollen memories

On Tuesday evening I went on a run with friends.  I was feeling so good until I twisted my right ankle.  See exhibit A.

EXHIBIT A:

My right swollen ankle triggered a couple of memories:

Once upon a time there was a sophomore in high school named Genny.  During 5th period chemistry class, Genny and a friend started talking about fainting.  Apparently her friend said that if you hyperventilate and then hold your neck to cut off circulation, you would faint.

"OooOOoooOoo.  I want to try," Genny thought. And off she went to 6th period volley ball.  During practice, Genny approached her teammate Judy and proposed this new found experiment!   Judy agreed to catch Genny when she fainted, and off they went to a wall.

Genny put her head between her knees and took quick deep breaths.  Then she stood against the wall with her hands around her neck.

1st attempt--no fainting.  2nd attempt--no fainting.  Judy was about to give up.  As Genny made her 3rd attempt, doubtful Judy started walking away when BAM!!!  Genny fainted on her face! Her right cheekbone!

"OoooOoooOOo," Genny moaned.

Suddenly the team started to surround her when Genny said, "I think I broke my right cheekbone.  It feels really swollen."

"Your left cheek is swollen as well!" her coach added.

"No," Genny clarified, "I just have big cheekbones.  It's my right one that hurts."

Once upon another time, a college student named Genny was walking down a street in Florence, when an old Italian man screamed, "SILICON!  SILICON!"  As he screamed, he pointed at Genny, then pointed at his cheeks, then pointed at Genny again.

The end. 
Except if you want to know of a 13 year old girl who accidentally tipped a piano onto her foot...

who's the favorite?

So I thought I'd be cruel and had Dan sit on one side of the room, and me sit on the other side of the room.  

Elena was in the middle of the room.  

The challenge: Who would Elena go to when called?

Mom: Elena come heeeeeeeeeeere.

Dad: Elena, come to Daddy.

Elena was shaking her head at both mom and dad while rolling on the floor.

Mom and Dad both put their arms out: come here!  come give me a hug!

Dad: Elena, do you want a cookie?.

Elena running into Dad's arms: cookie?  COOKIE!  Bye Mommy!
While Dad is carrying her away: Daddy will always give you cookies, not like your dietitian Mommy who will only give you fruits and vegetables...  
(In mommy's defense, that is totally not true).

embarrassing, just embarrassing

See this picture?  It's of Dan reading a bedtime story to Elena about a half an hour after the missionaries left our home.  Now, look at this picture.  Look at the toys on the ground.  Look at Dan on the big couch.  Look at his feet.  Look at the colorful toy to the right of his feet.  Imagine that just 45 minutes earlier there was something else right next to that round object near his feet.

Tonight the missionaries shared a spiritual message in our home.  As they entered the house, I apologized for leaving all of Elena's toys out on the floor.  Over half way through the lesson, Dan looked down at his feet and noticed that my big ol' nursing bra was laying fully stretched out on the floor near one of the toys.  He quickly threw it to the side of the couch as discreetly as he could, which, if you look real close, you can still see a piece of it hanging out.  Of course he told me this immediately after the elders left. 

Oh... I am hoping that they didn't notice, though I highly doubt it.  Those poor young Elders.

Embarrassing, just embarrassing.

you dare mock me

In the bath tub, Elena stands. 

While waving my index finger up and down, 

I command, "Elena, sit, sit, sit!" 

Elena turns, waves her index finger in the air and says "Da, da, da!"

You dare mock me, child!?!?!?!

And it starts. :)

Quirky

Thesaurus

Adj.

1.

quirky - informal terms; strikingly unconventional far-out, offbeat, way-out, kinky unconventional - not conventional or conformist; "unconventional life styles"

Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2008 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.

---

quirky

adjective odd, unusual, eccentric, idiosyncratic, curious, peculiar, unpredictable, rum (Brit. slang), singular, fanciful, whimsical, capricious, offbeat, out there (slang) We've developed a reputation for being quite quirky and original.

Collins Thesaurus of the English Language – Complete and Unabridged 2nd Edition. 2002 © HarperCollins Publishers 1995, 2002

So I finally filled my frames in with pictures after 4 months.  Hurray!  As I was peering at them through the camera, I ended up focusing on my feet, which brought back memories.  (PS.  Dan is currently not here to defend himself)

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Genny and a boy named Dan.  They were "a pair".  Dating, if you will.  One afternoon while lounging on the couch, Genny decided to start a conversation about quirkiness.  She went on to tell Dan how she thought he was quirky when she first met him.

Could you blame her?  Their first real encounter was on BYU campus; Genny was walking through the Talmage building and was stopped by Dan, who was dressed in black slacks, a white dress shirt, a bow tie, and had his hair parted down the middle!  This was normal for him. Very quirky.

Back to the lounging on the couch scene.  So Genny asked Dan, "Is there anything you thought was quirky about me?"  (First off, why on earth did Genny even ask this question?  She just set herself up for a ride.  Also, keep in mind that maaaaybe Dan didn't understand the definition of the word quirky.)

quirky #1: Genny's feet

He didn't think they were very attractive.  They look "different".  The second toe is really long.  They were (and still are) sandpaper-like-rough to the touch.  So they aren't very feminine, OKAAY!  Genny was sooooooo offended.  Maybe more insecure.  She thought, does he value my feet over my face?  Why do I even wear make-up?  What about my eyes?  Isn't that what people look at?  My FEET!?!?!?!  I can't change my feet!  Who cares about feet?!  Oh, he just went below the belt. 

quirky #2: Genny's name.  GENNY.  He never thought he'd date a girl named Genny.

and quirky #3: Genny's pinky finger.  He thought that her pinky finger looked really short compared to her ring finger.

At this point, Genny thought, This relationship can't go on. 

But it did.  

And they got married.

Quirky and all.

The end!

(Boise, ID wedding reception.  Dan teaching my dad and I how to tie a bow-tie.)

miscommunication, part __

Yesterday we were at a ward "game night".  It was about over and we were all cleaning up.

One woman had a  plate of fudge in her hands and said, "What am I going to do with all of this fudge?"
Dan put his hand to his mouth, communicating "Eat it!"
She said, "Oh, I can't eat all this.  My figure is just aweful!"  
Dan, referring to the fudge, said, "It looks really goooood though."  
She then replies with a big smile, "Oh, why, thank you!"

Either she received a big compliment for her fudge, or her figure.  I guess we'll never know!

"This morning's shower", a poem, by Genny

This morning in the shower as I washed my dirty hair

I left the bathroom door ajar so "she" knew I was there

Every now and then I peeked to see if all was right

And at that final peek I viewed the ghastliest of sights

She tipped the bathroom trashcan, yes, and scattered things around

As happy as can be, she was, until her crime was found.

The end.

This wasn't typical trash, folks.
Did I mention that it's mommy's "time of the month"?

Gross.  Gross.  Gross.

My korean mom in an "Adam Lambert" haircut

Do you remember last year's American Idol?  Do you remember Adam Lambert?  I just remembered this and thought it was funny, so I called my korean mom.

ME:     Mom could you tell me the time when you got your haircut like Adam Lambert?

MOM:  I walked into church (during sacrament meeting) and sat next to Maggie.  Maggie LOVES Adam.  I  wrote down on paper, "Do you like my hair cut?"  Maggie wrote "yes".  I wrote, "Adam Lambert haircut".  Maggie bit her lip to not laugh loud!!!!!

IMAGINE: middle aged women writing notes to each other and giggling during sacrament meeting.  Oh yeah, and my mom in an Adam Lambert haircut.

MOM: Adam Lambert haircut is a very.... a very... how could I say?  It's a very stylish you know?

Unfortunately, I don't have the evidence, but can you imagine it?

 

Katie's Coat--a music video

Two days ago, Genny embarked on a grand endeavor - reading every post we've published on our blog. After a full review of the events transpiring in our married life, Genny recognized that she had omitted one of the most significant inspiring events - when Auntie Katie left her coat in Matt & Debbie's closet while visiting in Provo, UT.
Upon finding Katie's coat, Matt and I determined the best action to take - create a music video. When you've lost something important to you and can't find it, don't you ever wonder what happened to it? If the coat could talk, what story would it tell? We set forth to tell this story. We present to you - Katie's Coat, a Music Video. By Matt S and Daniel P, starring Matt as, the Discoverer, Debbie as herself, and Genny as herself.

Can you say, PREGANANT?